Our dining room at ChristmasI’m starting Christmas early.
It’s so out of character. I was the one who always wondered at anyone who decorated before Thanksgiving. In my mind, Christmas should not begin until after Thanksgiving…don’t let my favorite holiday (Thanksgiving) be obscured by Santa and reindeer…or even a nativity scene. Let Christmas have its own time, and let “Harvest Thanksgiving” have its own time.
Noooot this year. I’ve found myself playing Christmas music, and I am going to begin decorating today. (Well, if I can feel better – I’ve caught Tim’s germs – plus we have a basketball jamboree today with our boys, who are playing in a league this winter.) If I can gather energies, I will be decking the halls late into the night, tonight. We don’t decorate the tree itself until the night of Thanksgiving, or the day after….but that tree will be up, lights twinkling, and all other holiday home decorations will be out by mid-week, and Christmas music will be gently wafting into the kitchen, and down through the hallway, and into each bedroom.
I rarely analyze myself – I just go with “it”, whatever “it” is. I live intuitively, and that is far different from living impulsively. It is deeper, and more poetic. I feel around in my soul, and what is found there, I don't analyze….I just go with it. I do not trust myself, per se, but I do trust the strong and vibrant life of Christ in me. I'm not characterized by censoring my every thought or deed.
But this one needed analyzing. In 22 years of marriage, I’ve never rushed Christmas. Why this year? It was then I realized…
This will be the last Christmas with just us six….together. Yeah, Justin will still be here among us – often, if not all the time. But he does go home at night. And he is forever welcome - truly a part of the family.
Something inside me – the deep that calls to deep – is urging me to linger around the manger and the tree this year. Once May gets here (yes….May!) things will never be the same. She won’t come home for summer break, as other girls often do. She will drop by, this summer. She won’t be home for Christmas next year…she will visit on Christmas day. Then she’ll have to visit his family. By then, she'll belong to them too. I will have another son, they an only daughter. That's how this thing called "Godly marriage" works. What is his will be hers, what is hers will be his.
That’s the reality. And it both breaks my heart and thrills my soul, because my Hannah is marrying a man of God, and that is what every mother dreams of for her daughter. This blessing, I will wallow in. I will talk about it, revel in it, and rejoice.
So I am asking you ahead of time to please bear with me as I start the roller coaster ride of “time-between-now-and-May”. Bear with me as I hum carols and bake cookies and clean house like a woman possessed with the notion that time is running out.
6 comments:
Mmmmhmmmm...I will be humming the tunes right their with you, sister. Our Kylie has gone to Ole Miss. for Thanksgiving. I want them all here for Chrismtas, as dear (future) daughter-in-love, who visits us several times weekly while dear son still lives in Omaha, asked me to sing with her mom at the wedding in July.
Ahem.
Can you pass me a tissue while I thrill, wonder, and cherish this transitional season right along with you? :-)
Hey Sheila! I remember my family (more so my mom and I and sister ha!) experiencing all of those same feelings last year when Jaimie got engaged around this time last year. It is an adjustment and this year, on the other side of the wedding, we get to share her! So I can hear where you are comin from! But, we are blessed to have Chad in the family. and TODAY WE PUT UP CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS too!!!! It is such a fun and joyous time and because of last nights snow fall, I also have to shovel then come in and warm up. I wish you could experience a ND Christmas some time! We miss you guys up here! Have a blessed Holiday Season!
I will be thinking of you when I'm soaking my pooped body in my bubbles tonight...with thirty+ coming on Thursday I took the initative to go ahesd and decorate for Christmas today, too. Well not the tree; we'll get that next week-end from the mountains. That's my B'day tradition. :) Maybe it'll SNOW!!
I say go for it! Enjoy every minute! Of course, I'm a Christmas fanatic anyway... But seriously, just enjoy the season to the fullest and don't feel bad at all for "celebrating early." Especially with this being the last year of Hannah living at home, still bearing the Atchley name.
We were planning to put our tree up today, but ended up delaying it until Monday (still early). And actually, with the first of November being on a Saturday, Thanksgiving is a little later this year. So really we're all just starting our celebrations around the same time we're used to doing it. ;)
I love the phrase intuitive but not impulsive. Actually that clarifies how I am. I am going to lift up my head a bit more when challenged.
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but just to say the hayling sea baptism clips are now completed. I think you'll love 'em.Well you'll probably think we're all mad.
Kim - that's right! You have one getting married too. Doesn't it just take your heart and squeeze it? I am on the edge of tears all the time. Here, beautiful one...here's a tissue. Blow.
Rach!!! Aw, it is good to "see" you here. I miss you. I'd love to see one of your white Christmases.
(((((Jamie Weeks))))) I prayed for you, just today on the way home from church. (I'm sure people think I am mad...as people come to mind, I pray, whether driving or walking or sometimes even in the grocery stores or shopping malls, I'll get so focused on who I am praying for, or what I am praying about, that I whisper "out loud"...I don't use my "regular voice", but I catch myself whispering rather loudly - praying my heart out. Suffice to say, you and your celebration are covered in prayer. Expect the presence of Christ to be soft...strong...near-tangible!! It will be a precious time.
Liz, you are the Christmas Girl! I had no doubt you would be THE ONE to encourage my early-for-me celebrations. Love you dearly, as always.
Soooooo Chris. You are the scientific/intuitive mind. I would never think you are mad - because I could easily be labeled the same way. ACK! We who think out loud are always at risk of the general population calling us crazy. :-)
I'll "come see you" soon! Looking forward to a moment to lolly-blog.
Well, I'm off to the races. Miles to go before I sleep...as Robert Frost would say. 10 PM here and still much to do before bed.
Hope all had a blessed Lord's Day!
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