Being Bad Never Tasted So Good

If you like funnel cake, run, don't walk, to your local Burger King.  For real. 

So I went out this evening, all by myself.  I ended up being bad.  Very bad.  Not only did I shop (for other people's birthdays, so its okay) I decided to run through the BK drive-thru for a coffee, and spied an advertisement for this:

 Funnel Cake Sticks.  Gentle reader, I did something completely out of character. 

I ordered them.

And ate every.  single.  one.

::hand on heart, eyes rolling in an only slightly exaggerated expression of complete bliss::

Ssssssseriously.  So, so good.  I sat there in my car, and quite nearly hugged myself in gluten-ous, sugar-fied, deep-fried joy.  I was being bad, and I was loving it.  All that gluten and sugar, deep fried, just because I can.  Don't hate on me for it. 

I'll be walking my three miles in the morning.

As I drove home, on a dangerous carb high, I noticed the driver behind me was...shall we say "unhappy" with the speed I was driving.  He was all over my back bumper.  He tail-gated my backside all the way up Schaad road.  Suddenly, I saw the traffic light just ahead, and a (again, completely uncharacteristic) thought hit me.  Maybe...just maybe...this traffic light would change at just the perfect moment.  I slowed down even more.

I saw my chance for vengeance.

The deep fried funnel sticks made me do it, I swear.

I timed it perfectly.  The light did change from green to yellow, and I hit the gas...and the guy behind me could not make it.  This intersection happens to be monitored by Big Brother and his camera, so running a red light is costly and the tail-gating truck knew it.  He had to slam on his brakes.

I threw my head back in glee....and heard an evil laugh come rolling out of me!  It sounded sort of like "muuuaaaahahahaha..."

I have got to get me some more funnel cake sticks.  They make me sassy.

Upon my arrival home, I did my best to put on an innocent face.  Then, I just blurted it out as I came in the door - "I found the most yummy thing in God's earth for only one dollar seventy-nine cents!"

My man took one look at me, surveying me up and down as he is wont to do - we haven't stayed married for twenty-four years for no reason - and said, crisply ~

"I can see.  What's that all over your skirt?"

It was powdered sugar.  Lots of it. 

I was bad.  And I think I will be bad again someday.